the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

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the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  jay;love_ on Sat May 03, 2008 2:27 am

Johnta Ausin was my Inspiration.
This is Rated. [MA]
The Language is kind of out there...
By the way, My Names Jaylyn. ;]
Alot of people just stick to Jay.











The One That Got Away...







Every life has one true love.
A true love that is designed for them.
A love God created, destined to be with one other.
So when you find yours hold onto it tight & don't let go...

you'll regret it.


---------













I try to keep my life hidden, because i am honestly ashamed of it. Im ashamed of my past, and im ashamed of my present. Hell, im even ashamed of my future. Im ashamed of the things i've done to please others, and im ashamed of what i've become.
I dont know how to fix it...
and all i want is to go back, and change my decisions.


problem is i can't. I've given up.
So now all i can do is take what i've been given,
and run with it...


----------



"Carnell get yo lazy ass up, Nigka! Its time for school...Ayo Im fuhreal, Bruh! GET UP!" My brother, Ricky, woke me up wit a slam of his pillow, like it was just what i needed this early. School was the last thing on my mind while i was out dealin last night at that party.

I wasn't even supposed to be at that party...i dont even know how i got there...

I dont sell crack for the money.
I dont sell white to get fake ass 'street-cred.'
I dont do it to impress people.
And i sure as hell dont do it cuz somebody make me.

Sometimes I dont even know why.

But I do it for the adrenaline rush.
I do it for the challenge.
I do it just because of the fact that I know i wont get caught.

yeah lil nigga, im cocky. so what?

all that otha shit is just side benefits.
I know, its grimey.
But i like it.

Everybody knows all about my life. They know i work hard, and party harder. They know what i sell, how much i charge, and where i get it from. They know how bad I truely am. And they all know i get tha girls. I dont flaunt that shit. I dont even know how they know. But they do, and yet they stay around...

----------

"Shut tha f.ck up, chinky!" I yelled in my brothers face, pulling the covers over my eyes. Too much sunlight man. Too much. "Nigka, dont make me go Bruce Lee on ya ass." He said wit a smile, clockin me wit da pillow again. "Whatever man, go back to laos where you came from."

----------

My Brother Ricky was adopted when we were both four years old, from Laos. Its this place in asia, and there was this war goin on. They were killin off all the unwanted babies. Ricky was found abandoned, diggin in a trashcan one day trying to survive. Needless to say a week and a half later he was ours.

I love that Asian dude like my blood. Real Talk.
When no one else is there. Ricky is.

----------

My Dad split a little after I turned thirteen. and to make a long ass story short I dont miss him.
Ricky dont miss him.
and we dont need him.
We've outgrown him...
Him, and all his promises.

Moms all we have.
She's all we've ever had.

----------

"Let's dip, Nigka." He said to me, following me down the stairs of our large home. "Naw, Bruh, Im tired." I stated throwing on my phat farm hoodie dad sent me for christmas. Ricky put on his Yankees Fitted and sighed. "Carnell, forreal, lets be out. Kick, Push." "Aight, aight!" I reluctantly replied. We jetted out on our skateboards, only means of transportation, to morose high school, first day back from winter break of junior year. Ricky just turned sixteen the past week. Ha, first day should be a bitch, dude. But im out to find my honey dip.

When I'm dippin' on the grind I get my money quick...
But sometimes I wanna lay up wit my honey dip
She be wit me cause she aint like all them other chicks
Let you hit, then she split, that's why I got a honey dip

From the club to the telly you know how it is
Most of these chicks I never tell 'em where a nigga live
Tryna reach me at my mansion or my mother crib
Hit my cell, hit my two, now I'm at my honey dip's...


Last edited by jay;love_ on Tue Jul 01, 2008 9:38 pm; edited 20 times in total
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `faith . on Sat May 03, 2008 2:34 am

i guess i've gotta start bumpin on here.
upz jay.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  they2fkid. on Sat May 03, 2008 2:42 am

the song iz beautiful.
tight story.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  free - dumb . on Sun May 04, 2008 9:16 pm

bumpz yo

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `faith . on Sun May 04, 2008 10:43 pm

upz jaylyn.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  * t a y ; on Mon May 05, 2008 3:02 am

bump ;

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `faith . on Tue May 06, 2008 12:14 am

* t a y ; wrote:bump ;
^^^
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  jay;love_ on Tue May 06, 2008 1:15 am

still catching up....










sometimes, man, i wish i was more like Ricky. He aint nothin like me...

Ricky has straight a's.
Ricky got a real job.
Ricky got HELLA swagg.
...and Ricky knows exactly what he wants for the future.

When Rickys at basketball practice;
Im out sellin dope.
When Rickys workin a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese;
Im still out sellin dope.
Ma doesn't have to worry about Ricky at midnight everynight.
Chinky got his fat ass head in a text book, studyin.
& WHAT AM I DOIN?!
Im out on the streets...sellin dope.

Dont get me wrong. I told you before i love what i do.
But sometimes i just dont wanna deal wit the stress...or the anxiety...or anything.
...And i think I dissapoint him sometimes.
The last thing i wanna do is dissapoint Ricky, man.
Ricky loves me, man.

And Everynight before i go out to make a run he tells me so. He's afraid one day i wont come back...and he'll never get the chance to say he loves me again...

Nigga worries too much!

----------

We make it to morose for the start of our second semester, but personally im only here for the girls, and to sell. Everybody and they mama came lookin fresh as shit wit they new gear on from Christmas. I already gave myself props this morning. I know im fresh, today. Hell, i do it EVERY morning. My English teacher calls it "positive self talk" whateva tha fuck that is.

Its a daily thing.

Right after i hop out the shower every morning all steamy and stuff I stare myself down in the mirror, lick my lips and say;

"Carnell Breeding. You, my friend, are the shit."

Just to remind myself how sexy i really am.
Its gotta be a daily thing. Cuz im just that sexy.

----------

Ricky turned his fitted to the back as i tried to open the locker we shared for the fourth time. no joke. I cant believe i forgot that f.ckin combination over the break!

"Nigka...the f.ck is you doin?! Dang. Move out the way!" He said, giving me a shove. "SHUP UP RICKY! I got this..." I say. Knowing damn well that iono this code. He slaps me across the head and twists the lock a couple times, mumbling "Dumbass Nigka..." and placing his skateboard inside while grabbing his geometry book....he just got lucky, anyways!

"What up witchu?" He asked me, I guess readin' da aggitated look on my face. "Ayo, I gotta handle some shit, tell Ms. Marshall ima be in there, tho. Aight?" "Nell, man, Im sick of you and yo shit!"

Dont go there, Ricky...

----------

Dude always wanna tell me I can just magically start all over and be a "normal 16-year-old" boy.
Ricky always says the best is yet to come.
Rickys optimistic.
Ricky wants change.

But im in too f.ckin deep to change now.
He just dont understand...

----------

"Ricky..." I say, my words fizzling off. "Bruh, I love you! You know i D---" "I know you do." I cut him off as we both smile, bright. "Look man, i mean...You could die out there." Nigga always wanna piss me off! "I KNOW, RICKY! I KNOW!" His eyes glared at me as he shoved me, "THEN WHY THE HELL DO IT, NELL?! HAVE YOU EVA EVEN STOPPED TO THINK ABOUT HOW IT'D AFFECT ME IF YOU WAS GONE?!"

No...

"ITS MY LIFE! LEMME F.CKIN LIVE IT!" I pushed him back, this time into a locker, "YOU WONT BE LIVIN NADA IF YOU KEEP THIS SHIT UP!" "SHUT THA FUCK UP, RICKY!" He stared at me in my eyes for what seemed like forever. We both had eachother by the collar, tight.

---------

We have stupid ass blow-outs like this all the damn time.
...And i usually end up leavin school.
Iono what it is...but Ricky somehow always knows how to make me feel like an asshole.

Then we get home and he wont say two words to ya boy! It tears my heart up inside. But i cant quit da game!

I've come too far to back out now.
Im one of the top dealers in atlanta right now.
I wont stop.
I can't stop.

If i stop the whole game might fall to pieces...

---------

"Carnell when i met you, you dont know how happy i was to have a brother! I thought i was so lucky. But these days all i can worry 'bout if if you gon' make it home. You dont know how much time i waste on the daily worryin about if yo ass is gon make it out alive...Its not fair, Carnell." I could tell he cared. But i couldnt lose the fight. My Ego got the best of me. I know i shoulda stopped there...but i didnt.

"NOBODY FUCKIN TOLD YOU TO WORRY!" "YOU KNOW WHAT NELL!? FUCK IT, AND FUCK YOU. You're so selfish..."

--------

Im not that selfish...am I?
I dont try to be....do I?
I shouldn't second guess myself, right?
I mean Ricky cant stay mad at me forever, can he...?

----------

He looked me dead in the eye and said one last thing that hurt me, bad. "You make me wanna give up on you, Carnell. You make me wanna forget i even have a brother. I'd sleep so much easier without this in my life. This shit is pointless man, im over it. You just do you..."

----------

Yeah.
That one hurt me down to my ankles.
But being me, ofcourse i didnt let it show...

..well, maybe a little.

----------

With all that said he slammed our locker and strutted off, mad as hell. But i wanted the last word...I always had to have the last word. So i yelled after him. "YOU ALREADY KNOW IMA DO ME! NIGGA, SHIT...aint gotta tell me twice..."

People were starring, some smiling, some scared. I yelled at them, too, to release more of my frustration. "WHAT THE FUCK IS YALL STARRIN AT?!" I screeched. They scurried off like cockroaches to the light to their various homerooms, and i started to walk off as well. Then i remembered;

I needed my Geometry book, too.
if only i could open that gay ass locker!

"DAMN!" I shouted. I couldnt open this locker if my life depended on it.

Psh, just forget it.
I got shit to handle, anyways.


Last edited by jay;love_ on Thu May 29, 2008 2:06 am; edited 1 time in total
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `shortie[NANNi] on Tue May 06, 2008 4:13 am

Oh my goshness. Shocked
The new icons are bitchin'! Razz
Sad My baby crazy is gone...
Sorry about all this Jay Laydee.
Your's is the first story I'm postin' on
and this stuff is new to me.

up[z]s bounce

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  * t a y ; on Tue May 06, 2008 6:12 am

bumppp .

* t a y ;

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  jay;love_ on Sun May 11, 2008 5:11 am

I hate it when dumbass niggas think i cant handle my shit.
Nigga im throwed in the game.
Shit, i invented the f.ckin game.
Nigga im hella high.
I could look into the sun's eyes.

Everybody know it, its about damn time you do too.
----------
Since I couldn't open that damn locker, I decided to just skip Ms. Marshall's class.

She old as hell anyways...
She wouldn't even notice i was gone!
And i think she likes class better without me.

thats not good...is it?

Anyways, I had to take a piss, so i went and handled my biz, and sure enough one of them dumbass niggas was in there.
he shoulda paid me on the spot.
----------
"MAN, NIGGA WHERE THE HELL IS MY SHiT?!!"

His names Sebastian. He's Mexican, and he got dis heavy ass accent that annoys the hell outta me. I hit him wit my upper cut, and when I saw he was down I towered over him, and pulled out my shiny switchblade. That shit comes in handy.

"Ayo Man...Look, I-I aint got it..." "F.CK YOU MEAN?! 'I aint got it...' PUTA I WANT MY DINERO!!"
----------
Truth is I didnt just want it.
I needed it.
Bitch I love money!
Im a f.cking fanatic.
---------
I bent down so that I was at his eye level and placed the blade to his neck. "...AY CHI WAWA! AYE MAN...I-Im sorry." There he goes again. With that damn accent. "SORRY DONT GET IT, BRUH!" i yelled, and bent down just to get in his face some more. I then pierced his skin a little bit wit my knife. I watched in amazement as the blood trickled down his neck, and the tears flowed down his caramel toned face.

"....I-I'LL GET IT! I WILL!" he screeched, scared as hell, haha. "PLEASE DONT KILL ME."

I smiled a little.
This stuff made me laugh.
What can i say?

"this is whats in store for you if i don't get my sh.t by this time next week...got that?" when i say shit like that, im kinda calm. But its an eerie calm. a haunting calm...that calm took hella practice, bruh.

After i was done talkin he simply nodded.
When i got up i stepped into a puddle of some kinda somethin'...

Ugh! this nigga nasty as hell!
Wanna piss everywhere! Nigga, shit.

I know im scary, but damn.
F.ckin up my new dunks and shit!

I left sebastian there to soak in a puddle of his own piss.
Then the bell rang for second period.
But I wasn't worried about him snitchin.
Nigga wasn't stupid...
& I had more important things to worry about.

Like my new elective this semester.












i'd really like some bumps & comments ;]
the new update is coming up.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  * t a y ; on Mon May 12, 2008 5:02 am

cant wait for the new update (:
bumppp !

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  TAY.baby` on Mon May 12, 2008 2:13 pm

ahhhh hahhhh
he made him piss himself
that's my baby
makin niggas scared
go nellz
and don't worry
i'll get him for messin up your dunks


bumpies jay
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `faith . on Mon May 12, 2008 11:18 pm

carnell is a sick and twisted individual.
i understand he needed to get his money,
but the amusement he got out of
the whole situation scares me.
his whole cycle of emotions:
angry
amused/amazed
happy
then calm...
NOT normal!
---------------
and he never took a piss,
did the need just go away?
lol

bumpz jay.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  * t a y ; on Wed May 14, 2008 4:01 am

bumpp .

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  :)MaKiN_SeXy on Fri May 16, 2008 2:29 am

`faith . wrote:carnell is a sick and twisted individual.
i understand he needed to get his money,
but the amusement he got out of
the whole situation scares me.
his whole cycle of emotions:
angry
amused/amazed
happy
then calm...
NOT normal!
---------------
and he never took a piss,
did the need just go away?
lol

bumpz jay.



LOL i was thinkin the same thing
BUMP IT
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `faith . on Sat May 17, 2008 3:49 pm

:)MaKiN_SeXy wrote:
`faith . wrote:carnell is a sick and twisted individual.
i understand he needed to get his money,
but the amusement he got out of
the whole situation scares me.
his whole cycle of emotions:
angry
amused/amazed
happy
then calm...
NOT normal!
---------------
and he never took a piss,
did the need just go away?
lol

bumpz jay.



LOL i was thinkin the same thing
BUMP IT
good.
i'm not alone.
lol
upz jaylyn!
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  jay;love_ on Sun May 18, 2008 7:41 am

haha. thanks for getting me to the next page.



idk. i might stop this.
i dont feel like anybody really likes it =/
i really only come here to read faith's story lol.
and afew good others.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  free - dumb . on Sun May 18, 2008 4:44 pm

TAY.baby` wrote:ahhhh hahhhh
he made him piss himself
that's my baby
makin niggas scared
go nellz
and don't worry
i'll get him for messin up your dunks


bumpies jay
LMAO . LMAO . LMAO .
buuuuuuuuumps !
Jay, you are gonna continue this !
I WILL MAKE SURE OF IT !!!

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  * t a y ; on Sun May 18, 2008 8:11 pm

bumppp !
please continue thiss . )=

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  `faith . on Mon May 19, 2008 12:11 am

jay;love_ wrote:haha. thanks for getting me to the next page.



idk. i might stop this.
i dont feel like anybody really likes it =/
i really only come here to read faith's story lol.
and afew good others.
i wish you wouldn't,
you left me hanging
with one summer,
now this.
but you gotta do
what you gotta do.
i'ma getat you on myspace.
upz.
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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  patrick's_1inonly on Mon May 19, 2008 12:25 am

*new reader*

I like this stroy nellz is hard i have 2 read this
bump dis up!!!!!

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  Undacovab5lover on Mon May 19, 2008 12:30 am

patrick's_1inonly wrote:*new reader*

I like this stroy nellz is hard i have 2 read this
bump dis up!!!!!

HAHA A GOOD BOY GONE BAD!!!!

IM SO GONNA BUMP!!!!

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  kelly's_1inonly_homegurl on Mon May 19, 2008 12:35 am

Undacovab5lover wrote:
patrick's_1inonly wrote:*new reader*

I like this stroy nellz is hard i have 2 read this
bump dis up!!!!!

HAHA A GOOD BOY GONE BAD!!!!

IM SO GONNA BUMP!!!!
lmfao ree hes not rihanna
bumpz!!!!

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

Post  * t a y ; on Mon May 19, 2008 5:32 am

bumpp .

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Re: the one that got---a w a y.[+18]

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