the one that got away

meganmyxxb5fan Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:11 am

Carnell's in love how cute maybe he'll stop dealin and maybe she'll come to her sinces

*intotherush Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:08 am

OMFG

I CAN RELATE TO JAY AND CARNELL WITH SOMEONE IN MY LIFE SO MUC TAHT IT'S SCARY

*intotherush Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:29 am

OK WELL IT WAS SOOO CUTE EVEN THE FIGHT SCENE WAS CUTE I LOVE THIS STORY JAY I REALLY DO

jay;love_ Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:48 am

thankyou :]

Yeah, I know I'm a little past due
After all that I've been through
Break ups, and make ups, and mistakes
And heartaches, but that ain't you...
I wanna show improve
So what you wanna do
Kissing and hugging and touching
I ain't gonna lie to you.
cant turn back--tynisha keli

"How was the double date?" I asked my two closest friends, all smiles. They both scowled back at me, "that doesnt matter right now, Jay. You're hurting; we need to talk about it, right this second." Faith blatently said, linking arms with Teddy and I.

Damn, how did she know?
...its only been a week.

"How'd you know?" I innocently asked. "Its written all over your face..." said Teddy. "Yeah..." faith added, "I dont need to hear through the grapevine that my bestfriend needs me..." "We know that on our own." Teddy said, facing forwad as we continued to walk.

I faked my smile some more & said, "Well then you also know that I am in the process of getting over Carnell, right?" Teddy turned her head back around as she laughed in my face. "You can't get over him if you dont want to, Jay."

I sighed as we entered our busy school hallways. "& We all know the brain doesn't control the heart." Added Faith as we rounded the corner...Suddenly bumping into Ricky, JB...and Carnell.

"Whats crackin' ma?!" JB & Ricky said to Bree & Faith. All 4 of them looked so great together...it made me upset that Carnell was standing right there & wouldn't say two words to me! He acts like my feeling are my fault...The four of them went their seperate ways after saying goodbye to us. I guess they felt the tension, too...

"Neeeeezyyy..." I whined, hoping he'd give in without a fight. "Hell Nah, dont even go there wit me today!" He screeched, walking off toward his locker. I slowly followed him and leaned on the lockers beside his.

I watched him struggle for a while with it.
He cussed at it; punched it; kicked it & pleaded with it to open
but nothing worked.

I slid down and grabbed his hand, "lemme help you, Carnell." I whisperred, "No! Get the fuck away from me, Jay!" He yelled.

Yeah I know i made him hella upset.
But that nigga aint gon neva talk to me like that.

"Nell watch who you talkin to! I aint jus some otha hoe..." He heavily sighed, and backed up placing his hands on his head so that I could open up his locker.

Inside there was a graffiti sign that read

Lil' Neezy & Rick-aay!
Bros. Fa` Life.

There were pictures of Faith and I...
and pictures of me & Nell the first time he came to chill at my place.
There was a calender, full of cars.
& On Today's date it read 'pay-day from Uncle Rich, Nigkaa!'
...hmm, Nell has an Uncle? He never told me that!
& ofcourse they had a quote up by Lil Wayne.

Damn She Bad,
Damn She Thick!
And I Mite Not Know Perfect
...But Damn She It
And She Thick, And She Rite!
Damn She Nice...
You Can Be My Judge Baby
Yeah I'll Do Life.
promise remix--weezy.

"Thankyou Miss Jaylyn. Now, please...Just go away." Is he serious right now? "Carnell...I'm sorry, Baby! I been thinkin' about it since the day you left, and i'm sorry!" "You know what, I have too...& I thought that, you know, maybe i'd be better off without you anyways..."

He's trying so hard.
but he's NEVER gonna win.
Its me here.

I giggled. He looked adorable when he was mad.
upset...sad, happy.
He was so cute.
So, I laughed again.
He makes me SO elated.

"JAY, THIS SHIT AINT FUNNY!" "Neezy, Baby. You know I didnt mean to hurt you..." He looked at me with a cocked eyebrow. He's so sprung. "Leave me alone before I do something stupid..."

too late now, baby boy.
I got you.

He began to whine, "You're making me late!" "Since when do you care?!!" I said, eyes wide. His teeth were beaming, as he fakely smiled at me. God, he's so cute. "You're right, huh? I'm out..." He said, walking off. "NO NO NO!" I replied annoyed, pushing him back into the lockers. "...what the fuck?!" He yelled, stunned that i'd lay any fingers on him. "I said i was sorry..." I whisperred, pushing him down onto the locker doors, his lips just centimeters from my own.

Oh, How I wanted them on mine.
Wow, kinda fell of the truck there...
lets get back on topic!

"Sorry dont always get it, Jaylyn. You gotta show me somethin'..." He said, mocking my words voice in all.

This boy is so irritating.

I stared at him for a moment.
Him...then his sexy ass lips...then him again.
He is so gorgeous.
And so are those sexy ass lips...

So; I kissed them. And no, I dont regret it.
He stiffened up. But after a second he softened
& I let his tongue explore every crevice of my mouth.
I let myself melt into his arms,
& unfortunately I let his big ass hands grab hold of my goodies.

anything for him.

5 minutes passed.
No air, no collection of time, & no cares in the world.
Just our tongues intertwined,
his dick getting hard & my fingers
running through his waves.

3 more minutes...
perspiration on his forehead; his tongue in my ear
& My hand massaging everything in his jeans.
He moaned, yes, of pleasure---and of pure sexual frustration.

Success.

"Lemme get it, Mama..." He whisperred into my ear, clenching his teeth and pulling me closer. I could feel all of him.

We were so close.
There wasn't even room for Jesus.
The halls were empty.
The first period bell rang 10 minutes ago for class...

"Get what?!" I asked, not taking my hands off of him. "Stop it, you know what. I aint got none in almost 2 months because of YOU!"

I pulled away then
& quickly walked away.

"JAY STOP TEASIN' ME!" "...I didn't, Carnell." I smirked, "YEA YOU DID!"

Hahaha, okay maybe I did.
So what?

He grabbed me from behind & kissed my Neck. "You forgive me?" I asked, turning around to feel up on his abs. This kidd was ready to go... He acts like I dont know what he likes. "Yesssssss....now please, can we go! Stop playin wit me!"

He moaned again.
I guess he knew he wasn't gettin' none.

"Bye Baby..." I whisperred, getting on my tiptoes to plank a wet kiss on his cheek. He sighed, trying to keep his composure as I walked away.

I dont know.
He's outta luck today.
Maybe I'll let him hit tomorrow...
I'm on my period.

TEDDY™ Mon Jun 16, 2008 9:45 am

dayuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum.
she played his horny ass.

upz ;]

carnell#1babygurl4lyfe Mon Jun 16, 2008 4:03 pm

oh wow lol but bump

meganmyxxb5fan Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:50 pm

Oh shit that was great get it Jay for real I love it bumps

`faith . Tue Jun 17, 2008 3:25 am

i'm glad they made up,
hopefully they're done
with that situation.
&&' she shoulda just
told him she was on her
period. that would've
calmed him down real quick,
but she wasn't tryna do
that. lol.
upz.

*intotherush Tue Jun 17, 2008 4:53 am

LMAO OH WOW I LOVE HOW THEY JUST MADE UP LIKE THAT IT WAS TO CUTE IN A SCARY TYPE OF FASHION
BUMPIES CHICK BUMPIES

jay;love_ Wed Jun 18, 2008 4:31 am

it don't matter what you put me through
don't matter what I put you through
at the end of the day, you're my baby
& i L.O.V.E. you...
--lil fizz.

Everytime I'm around her I get in this trance
She's just so beautiful...
& she mines?!
Bruh, nothin' tops that.
I asked her out on Valentines Day...
Yeah i know, i kill 'em with tha romance, haha.
Its May now, though.
& We've been together for 3 months.
Its crazy how everything is fallin' into place...
And its crazy how fast I done fell for this girl.

I love her so much.
I'm just scared to let her know.
I've never been in love befofe...
I dunno how that shit feels!
...& I dunno what to say to her.

I'd die if she left me...
---------
I was in the kitchen gettin us drinks...all the while just starrin at her. She just kept layin there, watchin the end of 106 & Park, she wasn't payin me no mind. The Take You Down video was on. She kept yellin at the TV all the things she would do to that nigga, Chris? She swear to God he gon' wife her!

But someway, she stayed lookin flawless.
Iono know how she do it...
No one was home except Ricky
& I'd been wantin her for a long ass time.

"Mmmmm, he is fine as hell." She whisperred, eyes glued to the screen. Then for some reason she looked up for me, and noticed that I couldn't keep my eyes off her. "Nell, why you lookin' at me like that?" She asked, sounding a lil' worried. I walked over to her and stared somemore. "What? I cant look at my girl now?!" I grinned, "I dont like you lookin' at me like that." I popped the can to my coke and raised one of my eyebrows at her, "...Like what?" I asked, my eyes roaming her body in its entirety. "Like that!" She hissed, slapping my leg. I rolled my eyes toward the ceiling and bent down to her eye level. She just looked at me and sighed.

"What?" "You know what..." She looked confused. But I know she was faking it, "No, Baby. I don't. Whats wrong with you today? Is everything okay?" "Quit playin' stupid!" I whined, "I'm not!" She replied with a smile, stroking my chin. I knew she was just messin around, like she always does. "Gimme a kiss?" "No." "Why you so fuckin difficult, Jay?!"

I stood up mad as hell. She does this shit all the time, she so childish! "aint nobody difficult, Nell. You just mad cuz you cant have your way all the time..." She stood up off the couch and I placed my finger on her lips to shut her up. "Gimme a kiss." "No!" She said, disregarding my statement. "Pleeeaaasee Baby?" I begged, takin her in my arms. "No Neezy, Baby....Kissing you, it leads to everything else imaginable." "It dont have to." "But it always does!"

Yeah, she right.
But I cant help I'm sexy.
You cant blame a nigga when his woman cant keep her hands off him.
It aint my fault.

I went ahead and kissed her anyway.
I figured 'Hell, she'll give in later. Might as well handle it now.'
She nibbled on my bottom lip and I smiled at her.

I love when she does that.

I went in for round two when she poked her lips out for more.
She wrapped her arms around my waist, as I placed my hands on the sides of her face.

I dont even remember how it got this bad.
I guess when you in love it don't matter how you ended up there...
Just that you never wanna leave.
-----------
Jay knows how to get me stiff.
She knows my weaknesses
& she always finds different ways to get me in the mood.

Lil' Ma got skill.
I hate that shit.

It took a mere 5 minutes for her to get me ready.
I opened an eye, my lips still ontop of hers, so I could look for Ricky.
I caught a glimpse of him on the computer in mom's office.
Damn, that nigga stay online!
Aint got no kinda life...

maybe he just found his life in Faith.
that dude never has girlfriends.
no one ever took him seriously until her...
nobody worth his time, anyways.

I got so lost in my thoughts that I aint even notice she'd tugged me upstairs to my bedroom.
I smiled when I noticed my surroundings, & got comfortable ontop of her body.

Hell yeah.
Aint nothin' wrong with this...
I could get used to it.
We've never gone all the way,
But we come close all the time.
Its just...one of those things.
-----------
I licked her neck as I began to rub her inner thigh. Her body stiffened, so I looked up and kissed the side of her forehead to soothe her. "why'd you stop?" she whisperred, sounding a lil' nervous. "Hey, Its okay..." I chuckled, runnin my fingers through her mid-length hair. "You aint gotta do this if you aint ready, Babygirl...we can go as slow as you want."

I smiled at her, "We aint gotta rush this, Jay. Its way too special. We can always wait. Its whatever you want, whenever you ready..." She laughed and rubbed my back, "I've been ready for a while now. Something just always gets in the way....I want you to take it." I sighed, and wiped the sweat off my forehead, "But I dont wanna make you feel like im tryna force you or nothin'..." "I know how much you care about me, Nell. Now, come on! You keepin' me waiting. We dont have all night..."

Shit, thats all I needed to hear.

I still didn't wanna go too fast, though...
I dont needa fuck Jay to love her.
I mean, I already do...
Its her first time...she gon remember it forever.
--------
We played around for 30 or 40 minutes...by then we was both down to our underwear, & my dick was all the way ready. But I stayed focused on her. Its the only place i wanted to be. She let me unhook her Vicky's Secret bra, & I just sat and stared at her breasts for a minute or two, debating on which one to attend to first.

I bit my bottom lip.
got damn, her body is a work of art.

I decided on the one on the right, but I changed my mind at the last minute to the one on the left.
I sucked on it for a long ass time, kissin', lickin, whatever I wanted
while massaging the other one softly with my hand.

She dug her fingernails into my back, so I slowed down a little, and gave the other breast equal attention.
She opened her mouth to let out a moan, but I stuck my tongue inside instead, to keep her quiet.
I saw her go for my boxers, & I jumped a little bit when I felt her grab my shit.

I hate when she does that.
I lose it, everytime.

"Mmmm...Baby?" I whisperred, "Are you really ready....? I mean, we can---" "Shhh..." She cut me off. I licked my lips and nodded, my body going crazy, and my mind going a mile a minute. I started gettin' rid of her boyshorts with my teeth. She giggled at my stupidity, but I wasn't laughing...

I looked at the digital clock at my bedside.
Damn, Its 12:53.
...& I gotta get out and deal tonight.

I quickly got up and headed for the bathroom. "NELL?! WHA---" "HOLD ON!" I yelled back, stepping into a cold shower. I let the water run down my body, calming me down. I was hard as a rock. I quickly exited the water, and turned it off. I then started brushing my teeth, & I pulled up my plaid shorts, my toothbrush hangin' out the side of my mouth. When I looked up from what I was doing she was standing right next to me, in nothin but her panties, her hand on her hip.

My stick got stiff all over again.

"Jay..." I said, my words trailing off. My toothbruth fell outta my mouth as I swallowed, hard, desperately trying to keep my hands off her. "Carnell..." She pulled me close to her naked body, & I froze up. Its so hard to just leave her like this...especially 'cuz she dont even know why. She looked down, "Where are you going?" She asked as I slowly broke away for her arms to put on a beater.

She seemed so hurt.
& thats the last thing I ever wanna do to her...
She put her bra back on & stood in the doorway, her arms crossed.

Damn, she bout to throw a fit.

"CARNELL WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!" She repeated, all eyes on me. "DO YOU TRUST ME?!" I yellled back, walking toward her. "....yes." "then why does it matter?" I asked, frowning. I aint wanna leave...it just happened like that. I rubbed her cheek, "I'll be back as soon as I can...I promise." "But I dont want you to leave." "& I sure as hell dont want to!" I said, grinning. She sighed a disappointed sigh and smiled back.

"Gimme a hug..." I said. She got on her tiptoes as I held her waist, and felt her strawberry flavored lips ontop of my own. I rubbed her chin when she was done & pulled away. "Hey, dont wait up for me mama..." She nodded & I kissed her lips one more time before I left.

All I wanted was to stay and finish what we'd started.
But you know, like Jay says so often.
You cant always have what you want...

`faith . Wed Jun 18, 2008 5:22 am

wow, they got kinda close there.
carnell should've lookes at the
time first before he proceeded
with something like that. one
question jay: where's mommadukes?
lol. it's 12:53, do you know where
your mother is? lol carnell's double
life is conflicting with his other one.
he needs to just tell jay & deal
with what'll happen.
upz.

TEDDY™ Thu Jun 19, 2008 6:26 am

damn jay what the hell?
why couldnt they have just did the do
and then he coulda shot a look
at the clock ?!

ha, i feel sorry for girl
if i was her, i woulda just jumped on that

upz

free - dumb . Sat Jun 21, 2008 12:13 am

they wer sooooo close !

WHY THE HELL DID HE HAVE TO LOOK AT THATT CLOCK ?!?!?!? HUH ?!?!?!?

damn, mannn .

bumps !

meganmyxxb5fan Sat Jun 21, 2008 2:57 am

Damn he had to look at the clock

jay;love_ Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:01 am

Hell yeah, Its the Saturday before the last week of school, I'm so f.ckin ready to be done wit junior year.

I'm sick of school.
Sick of immature niggas.
& I sick of dumbass teachers tryna
tell me how to live my f.ckin life.

The only person i'ma miss is Mr. Floyd.

This summer gon' be tha shit.
I got my car.
& I got my baby.
thats all i need.
...& all I really want.

Now that I think about it the game dont give me the same rush as it used to. I dont know what happened! It just dont do it like it did before... You know, I'd rather have Jay pushin up on me in a closet somewhere...or on her parent's bed or something.

Yeah...its a rush fo sho.
& we just know we'll never get caught...

I aint sayin I wanna quit dealin'. Just sayin I wish it didnt interfere wit me & Jaylyn so much...
I really want us to work, but I dont think she trusts me as much no more...
Hell, I wouldn't trust me neitha.
----------
"Ayo Ricky! Toss me my phone?" He removed it from its charger in the living room as I pulled up my saggin coogi shorts. Ion even care for coogi, I just think the name is cool. I wore a black beater, and my new sneaks to match my jeans. "Aye where you goin' off to?" "Out wit Jay, Iono. Anywhere she want..." "You'sa sprung ass nigga!" "Shut-up punk." I said, narrowing my eyes at him.

JB walked in the room wit a bag fulla hott cheetos. "Fatass!" I chastisized, grabbin the bag. "This Nigga! Wanna eat up all the food & shit!" Ricky said, laughin. I popped a couple in my mouth & got out a handful to snack on, "Watchout, Nigga!" JB whined, swipin the bag from my grasp. "Its my food, bitch!" I said, slappin' the back of his head. Beat Without Base. filled the background.

"I take three L's to the head... Love, Live, Life & i'm dead. Young Money, Dipset, thats what this is! & If I aint good lookin' you can bet my bitch is..." I said, reciting the lyrics. Wayne is the shit. I had to fuckin buy The Carter III. That shit goes down in history. 7 million, in the first week?! AND IT WAS LEAKED ON THE INTERNET THE WEEK BEFORE IT WAS RELEASED?! I rest my case. "Man, Nigga, yo girl aint shit! Aint go no kinda ass." JB said, smackin his lips. I shot him a look, "Shut the fuck up, you big-ass hungry! Just cuz yo girl titties is non-existant!" Ricky laughed, "Yall Niggas is stupid." I laughed too, but JB started gettin' serious. I guess he was thinkin' bout somethin' wit tha lil' ass brain he do have.

My baby sexy as hell.

"Aye, when you gon' tell Jay you sell?" JB asked, diggin his crusty hand deeper in the bag, "Psh, neva nigga..." Ricky piped up outta no where, "Man, you might as well gon' n tell her now." "Why? It aint like she gon' know!" JB & Ricky both looked around nervous after I said that.

Fuck Naw! These Niggas snitched!

"YOU TOLD BREE & FAITH?!" "Man..." JB started, "Teddy was just like 'why does Carnell ditch Jay all the time? thats gay as hell...& then I said I didnt know! Then she brought up the fact that you be dealin! So I'm guessin faith told her!" "Damn, Ricky why your girl cant keep her mouth shut?!" Ricky was loss for words. He looked away...& then I realized he was in on it, too.

this nigga squealed.

"MAN CHINKY, WHAT THE FUCK?!" "I DIDNT TELL HER, I SWEAR!" "THEN WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?! SHIT LIKE THAT JUST DONT FLOAT AROUND!" "SHE JUST FOUND OUT!" I looked away, pacing the floor. "...You know how nosey she i---" "Hell Yeah!" "Man, she saw some white upstairs in our room & I had to fess up!" "Why she in my shit?!" He stood up, "Shit, Iono! It was on the dresser. Look, I'm sorry." "Sorry dont help! What now?! What if they told?!! I cant loose her..."

"...look man. We asked 'em not to let her know!" JB said, licking the red powder from his fingers. "dont sweat it." Ricky added, sucking his teeth while sitting back down and puttin his feet on the coffee table. "Man, you know they gonna tell! Them 3 is like the Diplomats...Bree, Cam'ron...Faith, Jim Jones...& Jay, Juelz. Somebody gonna say somethin....And I dont want that!"

"Chill Out, Dawg." "Yeah..." JB added, smiling, "whats the worst that could happen?" "I DONT EVEN WANNA THINK ABOUT THE WORST!" I screamed, ready to pull my hair out. "LOOK!" Ricky said, snatchin the cheetos away from JB, "Just go out on this date, play it cool & quit worryin'. You love her?" "Yeah Bruh!" "then go show her..." JB put his feet up on the coffee table, too. "Yeah, & hurry the fuck up! I mean, everybody else know how you feelin' for her. Its bout time you told Jay, too." "Aight, Damn! I will..."
---------
The door was all the way open when i arrived at Jay's doorstep, so I invited myself in, "AYE BABYGIRL!" I called out to her, so she'd know I was inside. Damn it smell good as hell in here. Maybe we should chill here & eat whateva cookin instead. "BABY, WHERE YOU AT?!" I called again. Still no reply. I heard pots bangin up in that kitchen though! So, i made my way over, but all I saw was an ass bent over in some tight-ass blue jean shorts wit a lil' cheek fallin out.

So, I pinched it.
...I wish I wouldn't have.

"Who are you?! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Damn, this must me the wretched stepmother...Her ass was juicy though, cant lie. "...Um, I am so sorry! My name is Carnell?"

Jayyyyy....Baby, I need you right nowww.

"So you're Jaylyn's boyfriend. You grab booties like that all the time?" She asked, making an irritated face. "No, ma'am. Just hers..." Her mouth dropped then.

Damn, that wasnt the right thing to say, was it?

"You're not what I expected." She said, pulling a full baked chicken out of the oven, her ass hunched over again. What? She tryna tease me now? "I know, I'm cuter huh?" I said, nervously, tryna lighten up the mood. "No. She said he was 'perfect'" She said, air quotes and all.

Aww, I love that girl.

"Obviously our definitions of perfect are far from being the same."

& this bitch just made me mad.

"....LOOK LADY, I---" Jay walked in the kitchen & interrupted. mmm, she lookin good, smellin right Yup, thats my girlfriend & Its all for Neezy.

& She a life saver, too.
got the total package!
couldn't ask for more.

"Nelllllllllll...Hey!" She interrupted, holding my waist & pushing her bang from her eye. The rest of her hair was in flowing waves, and her lipgloss was poppin. I grinned down at her. She's just pretty, thas all "Naomi, this is my boyfriend Carnell." "I know...we've met and he--" "New hair cut?" I asked, placing all of my attention on her while changing the subject. Her stepmom just stared at us. She prolly hatin! I mean, alot of females do, "Yeah, thanks for noticing. You like it?" She asked, running her fingers through her hair, & playing along, "I love it...Almost as much as I love--" "HEYY EVERYBODY, WHATS FOR DINNER?!"

Damnit! All these interruptions!

"Hi Daddy!" Jay said, brushing her bang back out the way once again. She let go of me & approached him, giving him a hug. She such a daddy's girl. "Hey sweetheart." He replied, grinnin real wide. He then took me underneath his arm, and gave me a nuggie. I've met this guy before, many times. I swear, one day he's gonna kill me with this shit. I like him though, "Wassup Carnell! Staying for dinner?" Haha, he think he so fresh. Nigga I aint in yo 'possie.'

I looked at Jay, and she kept smiling while shaking her head 'no.' "Uh, Naw. Not tonight, man...Maybe some other time?" "You got it, but Jaylyn, Baby. You're not going out tonight are you?" "Dadddyy...I told you i was 2 days ago!" "Damn, Really...? Must've forgot." He said, scratching his head. She grabbed hold of my hand & held it tight. "Jay..." he whisperred, "You know your mothers here! & she wants to see you..." "I dont care and you know it, Daddy! I dont even know why you brought her here!" She hissed, pulling me away.

What mother?

"JAY!" Her Dad yelled after us, but didnt follow. She just ignored him & quickened up the pace, "Baby lets go." She said, coldly, tears forming in her eyes. I stopped walking to slow her down when I noticed a woman making her way upstairs. I caught her strong green eye...& froze in my tracks.

Shit...I know her.
I used to sell to her.

"Carnell....come on!" "Jay, stop! Who's that woman?" I asked, innocently as I could, which wasn't much. "Just some random hoe dropping by. You know...I think i might've come out of her vagina but I'm not really sure...anyways lets just go have a good time tonight, Nell. I dont wanna talk about it." I stroked her face & kissed her cheek.

"Why? Why dont you like her..." Jay sighed, "She's a druggie, Nell...A crack fiend, an idiot. She was addicted most of my life but, she just got outta rehab...says she wanna 'change' for me. So my Dad's helping her get back on her feet. Its all bullshit. Aint that some bullshit?!" I looked her in her eye, and frowned. This is all my fault. "...why not let her try, Jay?" "Carnell you dont understand!" "How you gonna tell me what I understand?" I asked, sternly. She just looked away, letting a tear fall.

"Drugs are so stupid! They took my mom away...& broke up my family. Now I have A....a-a, Naomi & I despise that woman. Crack has no purpose. It kills, destroys, and gives the sorry people who sell it an excuse for a real job. I wish it was never created."

Damn.

I wiped her eyes with my thumb as I searched for something to say. "Uh...yeah, me too. But um, lets go, aight?" I said, feelin uncomfortable & hella guilty. "Okay...I'm really sorry about all this." I frowned, "Its okay, babygirl. I understand..."

I'm such a liar.

I pecked her lips a few times as I took her hand tightly in mine & walked out the front door. "Hey, lets go see the new Batman movie you been wantin to see." "Alright then! I'll buy the popcorn?" She giggled, walking me out to my car, "we'll even layer the butter how you like it...& throw in m&ms, too." I smiled at her and opened her door. When I got inside I just looked at her in my aviator shades. "You're a hot-ass mess." I told her, adjusting my mirrors, "I know." We laughed as she made a face for her camera phone, full of attitude "Neezy, get in the picture!" "No, Boo. I dont do pictures." "Babyyy, come on!" I sighed, and reached over, kissing her cheek for her photograph.

She took a look at it for a while, smiling, "Awwwww..." I took the sunglasses off her face so I could put 'em on mine & she scoffed me, "Uh huh, you think you sexy." She said rolling her eyes, "Babe, you know I'm sexy. Everybody else does...You a lucky chick." "Boy, dont flatter yourself." I got all up in her face, sticking out my tongue "Aye, that aint what you was sayin tha other night, now was it?!" She playfully shoved me as I chuckled, "Go fuck yourself." "Naw Baby! Why do that when I got chu?!!" I rubbed her leg, but ofcourse she pushed away.

I dont know.
She got this thing about fuckin in cars? Iono.

"I'ma Virgin." I made a face & laughed at her, "Psh, only technically, Ma. When I'm through wit chu, oohwee...You gon' wanna tap that all day & everynight." She looked out of the window, grinning, "kick rocks..." I laughed and went to start the car, but she stopped me & starred into my eyes for a long ass time.

I felt like she could see my soul.

"I love you Carnell Breeding." She said, softly, putting alot of emphasis on the word 'love.'

Damn, she beat me to the punch.

I kissed her lips softly & started up the car. Girl If I filled up the air. She smiled, and put the window down, humming the words.

She & I started hell with 3 little words.
3 little words that mean the whole fuckin world to us.

"Aye Baby, you know I love you too."

`faith . Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:50 am

uh oh, he never told her
&' now he's in too deep
to tell her. i guess i didn't
tell, yet. jay's family life...
no comment. i can feel
things being great for the
moment b/w them then
everything going downhill.
everything probably would
turn out fine if he confessed
&&' dealt with the consequence
but we already know this
stori doesn't have a happy
ending.
upz.

TAY.baby` Sun Jun 22, 2008 7:40 pm

damn i can't believe i missed all this lol.

bumpies

`faith . Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:28 am

*intotherush Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:18 am

oh god carnell know he should have told her about that he's in way to deep not to tell her

TEDDY™ Tue Jun 24, 2008 7:33 am

oh god jay. i am completely addicted to
this damn story !! carnell is way in now,
his shit gonna get his ass in trouble. hopefully,
not.

upz

jay;love_ Wed Jun 25, 2008 1:47 am

This ones for my homegirl Liz! Haha! ;DDDDDD
she inspriresss.

June 14th is next week.
That makes 4 months.
4 is almost 5, 5 is almost 6, and 6 is half a year.

I've been with one girl for almost half a year.

We're talking 4 months of bliss.
4 months of change.
4 months of a nigga like me fallin in love
...& 4 months of my repettitive lies.

I want it all to end.
I want to tell her the truth.
But its hard choosing between the game and my girlfriend.

Especially when i dont wanna let either of them go...
-------------
Jay called my cell a little after one, but i was out on the dark streets, bout to pop on a nigga, so i couldn't say much. I had him by his hair, and i couldnt let him go. "Aye Babygirl, whats poppin'?!" "...its whats crackin'" "dont nobody care bout what you reppin, nigga!" I pulled his hair tighter, and he winced. I took the phone away from my face and said, "Shut the f.ck up, Alante!"

"Nell?!" She called for me. Damn, i hope she aint hear nothin' "Yeah, yeah yeah! I'm right here, love, what chu need?!" I said quickly, in an irritated tone. I didnt mean to, it just slipped."What the hell is wrong with you?!" "Nothin, ma. Chill. I'm sorry, now what is it?" "I just wanna see you..." she whisperred. I knew she was upset bout somethin', but i knew she wasnt bout to let me in on it, either.

"Aye, can you sneak me in? You know...In a few hours or somethin?" I begged, kicking Alante in his balls. He fell to the ground and spat on my brand f.ckin new Spizikes.

I pulled out my blade, then.

"Carnell...at 3?! I know you aint serious..." "Yes?" I said, questioning my own got damn self. This shit is gettin outta hand. "Baby! Where are you..." She asked in a worried tone. I choked out, "I-I...I'm out." & in turn she replied, "Carnell I'm worried about you!" yelling though the phone.

Damn.

"Jay...Don't sweat it, aight? Call me later?" "Alright..." she sound like she about to fall apart. I dont think i can do this much longer to her. Its just too hard, "I love you, Girl." "I love you too, Carnell." She said. I know she was bitting her lip, just holding back the tears. She then began to sniff over the phone, and I knew she was about to cry. "Just calm down, baby. I'ma be there as soon as I can..." I whisperred. She didnt say a thing, she just hung up the phone, leaving me without a goodbye. I could tell she was about to burst into tears & it hurt.

it hurt like a mothafucka, actually.

& then i took a blow to my stomach?!!
so serious, I think i'ma die tonight.
Cuz eitha Jay gon kill me...or this Nigga gon get me arrested
& I'ma be chared with 1st degree man slaughter.
Thats 15-to life, bruh.

"THE FUCK?!" I yelped, flippin him on his back & punching him in the chest. He scratched my face, & then I pulled my blade up, slicing his neck "Nigggaaaaaaa, I will cut yo balls off! You dont konw who you f.ckin wit!" I slapped him across his face & He grabbed me by my collar, his blood drippin to the ground. The cut wasn't deep, but it was enough to piss him off "WHO THE FUCK WAS YOU TALKIN TO?!" "MY WIFEY, WHY IT MATTA, NIGGA?!!"

I refused to mention her name.
I knew he'd try to hurt her...or worse.
And he go to school wit us?
Hell Naw.

"She any good? Hows the brain, my Nigga? I aint got none in a minute..." He said, licking his lips. Why the fuck do I gotta bring out my heat on this cat?! Its only 800 dollars! I pistol-whipped his ass, and cocked my gun placing it to the side of his head. "Look, Dont make me blow yo brain to bits. Gimme what you fuckin owe me so I can go see my Baby. I mean, its simple as that!" "I AINT GOT IT, NEEZY!" "THEN GIMME ALL YOU GOT!"

aint so big is you now, nigga?
thats what I thought.

I stood up, and He pulled 350 and some lent from his pockets. I gave him a look, so he pulled out 50 more & then I let him go, shoving him away. "Tomorrow night I betta have my paper, Alante." "Aight, Aight!" He said, brushing his shoulders off, "Aint nobody playin wit yo ass, eitha, Nigga im dead serious. I want my shit." He had a scared look on his face as I walked away, puttin my weapons up.

Damn, I gotta quit fuckin wit broke-ass chumps.
Aint nothin but problems.
----------
I called Jay on my cell. It was almost four...but I figured I'd just stay the night, and walk across the street home in the morning, that is, if i'm alive. She groggily picked up, "...Nell?" "Baby, Im really sorry...Can you come let me in, please?" She scoffed me, "Pshh! Boo, Its four in the morning! I should make you crawl up the ladder up here, all this shit you put me through..." "Jay...please?" I sighed, hoping she'd pull through for me. "Hold On." She said, yawning.

Afew minutes later she cracked open the door and held her hand out to mine. I slipped inside, and we slowly walked upstairs to her room & I softly shut her door. I watched her lie back down in her bed, and i took a deep breath as I slipped all my clothes off, getting my basketball shorts off her computer chair. I swear, i leave some kinda clothing everytime i come here. I put 'em on over my boxers & just looked at her for a second.

She looked scared.
Irritated...and so very tired.
And its all because of me.

She yawned once again, and raised up her bedspread to let me underneath. She held me real tight, and laid on my chest, outlining the brand spankin' new scars on my stomach.

"....Carnell, Are you cheating on me?"

With the crack game?
Oh hell yeah, Ma.
...I spit it how I live it.

"Now why would I go and do that?!" I asked, jokingly, running my fingers through her hair. She then sat up, resting her soft hand on my stomach, and looking directly in my eyes.

this girl aint playin tonight.

"Carnell, this aint the time for games. I'm not a checker board...you wont be playin' me, and I mean that." I looked her dead in her eye as well, and told her the absolute truth. For once in this relationship. "I love you, Jay. & I mean that, too!" "Just because you love me doesnt mean you cant mess with anybody else. Carnell, Love is just a four letter word. It doesn't matter if there is no force behind it!" "SO YOU'RE SAYING THERES NO FORCE BEHIND THE WAY I FEEL FOR YOU?!" I yelled. She smacked her hand down on my stomach and I flinched. Alante's punches wasnt no joke. "OW!" "Shut-up! You arent even supposed to be here, Nell!"

"That 'four letter word' means somethin to me. You mean everything to me!" "So, You aren't then?" She asked, repeating her previous question. "Baby why would you even ask me that? YOU, you are my whole entire world...Everything I do, I worry about how its gonna affect you. Not some other bitch..." I reached up and touched her face, but she pulled my hand back down to my side, and frowned.
"I really do, Jay!"

There was a silence as she rubbed my stomach. I was glad; because it was killin me. It was like she knew exactly where I hurt, & knew how to heal it without even asking. "Nell, I trust you. Its just that...You always have to leave when I wanna spend time with you...So; it feels like I'm not worth it. Or that you dont wanna be with me...& it hurts sometimes---I mean, it hurts all the time."

Damn.
It got too far.

"Baby, I'm really sorry...I uh, I fucked up. But, thats not gonna happen anymore." She lightly ran her thumb over the fresh scratches on my face. I winced. "Okay Carnell....You promise?"

No! Not the p-word!
Why she gotta pull the p-word, for man?!
This aint fair!

"Uh, Jaylyn...Can we kinda just ease into this?" "Nell, what are you talking about?! Where do you be going?!" Perfect time to fess up, huh? Oh, Hell No. So she can beat my ass from here to Tokoyo?! I think not...I'll, uh. Tell her when I quit. Yeah, that sounds good. "Baby....stuff just comes up, but I promise. Aight?!" I said quickly, regretting every word i said.

Who's sprung?
Oh, hello...thats me! Right over here!
Jay just got me to quit the game...
I cant believe this shit.
Im quittin the game?!?!?!!

...I'm quittin the game.

"I love you. You know that dont you?" She layed down ontop of me, still starring straight into my eyes. "Ofcourse." She smiled for the first time tonight, & lightly kissed the bruises all over my body. Then she got up and went to the bathroom, coming back with some fuckin alcohol and a band aid.

Got Damn! Is this some kind of punishment?!
She dont even know whats going on, and I still feel like im the one loosing it!

"OWWW JAY!" "Shhhhhhhh..." I scwirmed in the bed, trying my best to shut-up. "...shit." I said when she was done. She continued to smile as she placed the bandaid over my cheek. "This Niggaaa...Ol' Nelly lookin boy!" She exclaimed, soundin just like Ricky. "shut the fuck up!" She gigled and layed down next to me in the bed. She rested her head on my chest while she rubbed my stomach some more, just like I wanted.

I put my arms around her, pulling her close, and closed my eyes. "...goodnight." I whisperred into her ear. She kissed me, and got comfortable in my arms. "Whatever it is that you do...Please, dont do it ever again." She asked. I nodded, not listening to a word she said. "Aight, aight. Get cha rest, Ma. I love you." "Love you, too." She sighed, closing her eyes.

TAY.baby` Wed Jun 25, 2008 2:55 am

hmm this getting
deeper && deeper
as the story goes
bumpies jay

`faith . Wed Jun 25, 2008 5:46 am

carnell quitting the game,
i'll believe it when i read it.
lol. &&' Onnie or Alante is
a bad dude. i hope him &&'
carnell don't go at it again.
i love the way jay broke him
down. he's a much better
person now because of her.
upz.

TEDDY™ Fri Jun 27, 2008 7:54 am

he needs to get his shit together
hes going to hurt her feelings bad one day

upz

free - dumb . Fri Jun 27, 2008 3:16 pm

bumps !

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the one that got---a w a y.[+18]